I have a screenshot to prove it

[Saltface]

Unbelievable.

 

Wanting to relax I took the Bayern for a Co-op.

 

This is the result - NO EDITING - I have the replay.

 

I sailed most of the time in a straight line through the middle of the map and I engaged two Omaha,  one Okt. Rev. and one Gneisenau and took down 10 planes (4 bombers and 4 torp.) The feat is not great. It is Co-op. Nothing amazing here.

 

What is amazing is that I finished the battle without even one HP point lost.

Damage Received 0 <---

I post this for your collection of the bizarre 

 

 

[anonym_2hneAFaIyP4T]

The collection of the bizzare normally abides here...

 

But, yeah, wow...

 

Reminds me of the only Kraken I ever got in PvP - New York I fired 8 salvos all game, got 5 kills and received a total of 43 hp of damage when I rammed a friendly!

[Saltface]

Sorry for miss-posting.

can I delete the thread and repost?

[Allied_Winter]

You can report your OP. Simply add: Off Topic  or something like that into the request line of the report.

[Tyrendian89]

nice one. Seems our Gneisenau coaching from the other thread has taught you quite a lot - that is quite the feat! I bow before you!

[Saltface]

@Tyrendian89

 

Indeed kind Sir, immensely I might add. I am grateful.

I must extend my gratitude to @LemonadeWarrior that had the courtesy and courage to play in division with me.

That was a great lesson from a wonderful young gentleman.

 

I am revisiting all the German BB's I skipped. Back to the basics.

 

You can't cheat the learning curve. I might write a long post about that.

[Panocek]

9 hours ago, Saltface said:

You can't cheat the learning curve. I might write a long post about that.

And here I thought enough raging, whining about "rigged RNG and noobs is my team" fixes all issues

[Saltface]

11 minutes ago, Panocek said:

And here I thought enough raging, whining about "rigged RNG and noobs is my team" fixes all issues

Dear @Panocek,

 

We might be living in a multiverse. Scientific advancement posits that the probability of a multiverse cannot be ruled out.

Hence, in that version of a parallel universe, raging, venting, rigged RNG and bad team mates could be the primary causal reason for failure.

 

However, and as I am convinced by my sensory faculties that I live in this universe, I shall refuse to wear a tin foil cap. That fashion is so outdated.

 

Grievance is a drug that provides easy excuses for ineptitude. 

 

 

[DasTongle]

I find myself everytime amazed by @Saltfaces post. :) I humbly wish that we get more nice new players like you and good luck in improving.

[Saltface]

@The_Reichtangle,

 

thank you but stop it please. (said with a big smile on my face)

Your compliments are wonderful but I fear my weaknesses more than I like my qualities. 

 

Dear Friend, it comes with age and two kids.

I do not know how I would react should I be a young boy.

Now, well over fifty (shhh...) it seems that one can approach things with more rational outlook and keep ones feet on the ground.

 

Thanking you for your compliments once again and your wishes are so very well accepted.

 

Regards

Saltface

[Panocek]

4 minutes ago, Saltface said:

Dear @Panocek,

 

We might be living in a multiverse. Scientific advancement posits that the probability of a multiverse cannot be ruled out.

Hence, in that version of a parallel universe, raging, venting, rigged RNG and bad team mates could be the primary causal reason for failure.

 

However, and as I am convinced by my sensory faculties that I live in this universe, I shall refuse to wear a tin foil cap. That fashion is so outdated.

 

Grievance is a drug that provides easy excuses for ineptitude. 

 

 

Tinfoil hat is never out of fashion, especially when it comes to games coming from "russian" background.

 

Players with pinch of humility are so rare one might forget they exist in sea of "I'm gud player but MM is rigged" examples

[Procrastes]

16 hours ago, Saltface said:

Wanting to relax I took the Bayern for a Co-op.

What is amazing is that I finished the battle without even one HP point lost.

Damage Received 0 <---

I post this for your collection of the bizarre 

The Bayern is one tough cookie.

 

I once sailed out alone to the northern flank at the start of a battle, with not even one of my team mates in company. I ran into a number of enemies, among them at least two battleships. I made a u-turn, sank the lead cruiser, and kept up a merry exchange of fire with the rest of them as they frantically pursued (their cruisers somewhat less frantically than the rest). Those that could hurt me I could outrun, and those that could outrun me I could sink. The only one that could even dent my plating was another Bayern. As I neared my homebase, my team mates had realized what was going on, and came back to find half of the enemy team strung out like a tray of pickles. Thus commenced what has gone down in virtual naval history as the Great Smörgåsbord of 2016. It was glorious.

 

As hinted above, I was in my Bayern when this took place. As should also be very apparent, this was not one of those "zero damage taken" battles - I don't think the old gal has ever been more battered and scratched while still remaining afloat. But the damage I received was a pittance compared to the frankly staggering amount of metal that simply bounced of my hull.

[Beastofwar]

The bots simply decided other foes were more dangerous

[Saltface]

12 minutes ago, Procrastes said:

The Bayern is one tough cookie

and that's why

6 minutes ago, Beastofwar said:

The bots simply decided other foes were more dangerous

Yet it remains a bizarre oddity to finish any battle having caused 98K damage and receiving 0

 

 

[Beastofwar]

One Bot : "can we reliably damage that ?"

Other bots :"Oh no thats one tough Cookie"

One bot : "then lets shoot the others"

Other Bots : "Ok lets do that"

 

And that is how you recieved no damage.

 

Without the jokes, yes that is pretty bizarre.

[EdiJo]

9 hours ago, Beastofwar said:

One Bot : "can we reliably damage that ?"

Other bots :"Oh no thats one tough Cookie"

One bot : "then lets shoot the others"

Other Bots : "Ok lets do that"

 

And that is how you recieved no damage.

 

Without the jokes, yes that is pretty bizarre.

Bot Collective Mind is one of their greatest advantages. One bot finds you attractive - and suddenly you have 5 or 6 targeting you. Wounded running-away cruiser will be focused from across the map, and charging Bayern killing everything will be ignored instead. 

[Bear__Necessities]

@Saltface if you ever feel like learning and diving myself, @Mr_Tayto and @Roisbheinn play regularly in the late evening, have lives and families, jobs etc so understand it’s not always doable. That’s if you think you can hack listening to @Mr_Taytobursting into song at all any mention of any word. How Rois hasn’t hunted us down and murdered us due to sheer annoyance is beyond me

[Mr_Tayto]

18 minutes ago, Bear_Necessities said:

@Saltface if you ever feel like learning and diving myself, @Mr_Tayto and @Roisbheinn play regularly in the late evening, have lives and families, jobs etc so understand it’s not always doable. That’s if you think you can hack listening to @Mr_Taytobursting into song at all any mention of any word. How Rois hasn’t hunted us down and murdered us due to sheer annoyance is beyond me

Yeah I'd be cool with that too. We do rip the pish out of each other constantly, too.

[Saltface]

@Bear_Necessities, @Mr_Tayto and @Roisbheinn,

 

Dear Gents, thank you for your offer.

I will make sure I will take advantage of it.

But please bear in mind that "you asked for it" LOL

 

Regards

[howardxu_23]

20 hours ago, Beastofwar said:

One Bot : "can we reliably damage that ?"

Other bots :"Oh no thats one tough Cookie"

One bot : "then lets shoot the others"

Other Bots : "Ok lets do that"

 

And that is how you recieved no damage.

 

Without the jokes, yes that is pretty bizarre.

Meanwhile in my nagato: 5 peeps shoot me even though there is a bayren and a scarnhost in 6km ish front of me.

how I think it should have gone:

 

One Bot : "can we reliably damage that ?"

Other bots :"Oh no thats one tough Cookie"

* nagato shows up further behind*

One bot : "can we reliably damage that?”

Other Bots : "yes we can deal lots of damage on that”

*proceeds to miss 70% of hits on me while baryarn and scarnhost ruin their day*