havaduck

You sure about that? Only 1 killsteal ...... doesnt look like Morten at all. Anyway huge thanks to @Skyllon - after only a few OPS he convinced me to get my [edited]into gear and at least try to be the biggest potato in field in my DDs + the rest of the games naturally. ......... and that last game with Sky and @Live85 I will remember definitely! Like I said: Stronkeru Boatu - just that I suck in DDs ...... but at least that one went somewhat well: (crashed a lot that evening, thats the only screen) Same thing - just solid Div carry: Problem is those T4 torp hits dont count for the mission ..... so the "highest" top boat I got that will actually do: Got another game with 10 hits - but we lost that one. Island best waifu, 10/10 would hug again. Sadly the Sims was actually not afk - he was on border doing god knows what. I guess its a bot because that nick is vaguely familiar. Last game yesterday ended with Kraken - thats always nice but tbf my div let me have it. Thx mates! Fun detail: I specked out of Last Stand for AR when you get blaped so much by BB AP anyways. Nowadays BB HE is a huge thing again thus -> Engine dead + fire -> Repair, Engine dead-> Cant repair ....... fun and engaging! And then this game: Right of the bag, they had a OMNI DD - and sure enough Dev. strike, whether that was First Blood too, I cant remember because we lost another DD immediately to a Dev. Strike. I was CONVINCED this is a loss. Ofc we still try anyway ...... and bitching in ts every living second (or is that just me ) Great, so our team gave A up for free, we dont have C, its very unlikely we can get B AND on top we got 1 vs 3 DDs ..... oh well ....... Team was ofc entirely useless, camping as one big blop several km behind us - their idea of an respond to ATTACK NOW! We got C thanks to a smoke added push of our div. (took a torp there - bad luck, would have needed 1 sec more and I would have been in cover behind that shallow island), and B thanks to a miracle + crossfire from C. Also from C we could delay their retaking of B for a long time - to not loose on pts. Still this was looking grim. So when we were still heavily outnumbered and I asked about the amount HP of the enemy Gneise and the answer was ....... nearly FULL! ( ) salt levels were rising. I went into attack position, just taking the bare minimum of time to start turning so he couldnt outright blap me (and he didnt, just reg. pens as I hoped), then another loop and Live and I did a perfect 2 vector attack run on the enemy - still healthy - Gneisenau. I dont want to tell Lives part, as that is his privilege but it involves "fun and engagment". I had one salvo before the time would run out, he had over 8k health left ......... Gneisenau my old friend, do you know that old proper that says "Baguette AP is best served salty"? I am very salty when I see german BBs park broadside, because nobody cant citadel them ....... Anyway not even exaggerating about the last second this time Obligatory live recording from TS: Those are the games to remember! So yesterday I played more (pvp) games than the rest of February combined (13 to 8 I think?) and when I expressed to TS my problems with viewing the french collection I stumbled upon my ingame profile ...... 66 % WR - yeah it shows that for a while now because it rounds 65,xx % up. Hm I wonder .......... First time I went actually over 66 % - next goal: 66,67 %.

Nah I took in the beauty an layout of the post all at once and decided I wouldnt bother. But even without reading I was able to deduce one thing: Could also be a "pear". I certainly does fit the description: (ah ok, our OP up there is not pure and cute enough, I admit) (Now, I know no one here is going to get that one, but I just meme-nerded the living hell out of this one )

If you are above T 8 km on T III you are doing it wrong. If you are above 11 km on T IV yo are doing it wrong. If you above 14-15 km on T V you are doing it wrong. If you are above 17 km on you are doing it wrong on some VIII manly IX-X. Consider at least 1/3-1/2 of that upper limit the "width" of a medium range engagement and position yourself accordingly. Make sure you are constantly hitting stuff and stay within effective gun range. People normally dont understand this but lots of targets (and a BB is a very durable target indeed) means heavy resistance to the enemy. Likewise, a BB firing (with even half decent aim) from effective gunrange is a menace ........ and dead enemy ship usually do very little damage in rerturn. I would recommend ships like the Bayern. Those guns are freaking bad, that unless you can roll the shells over a beam-bridge onto the enemy deck, you wont/hit and pen anything. That should help you with the "urge" to get closer. Likewise spec manual AA to keep Sky Cancer away and for the rest the invulnerable citadel and good armor to both AP and HE of Bayern will keep you alive probably longer than it balance wise should. Lastly: Bayern is also manoeuvrable and acceptably fast for a mid tier BB ....... just dont rush higher tier german BBs with torps ......

Everytime we get a new recruit I think of this: (I am just using @aboomination by random chance/recent sign up €: Also, I would be heavily surprised if @Loran_Battle isnt also a ME player who can appreciate this ^^) Gene: "Well, what about "aboomination"; he played solo so far?" Loran: "He knows how tough things can get on a 200 % weekend - without TS to share the salt even." Wolf: "He saw his whole teams compliment of DDs and BBs hiding at the farthest border, he could have some serious scars from that!" Loran: "Everyone playing this game has witnessed quite something at one time or another, also that avatar ...." Gene: "Is that the kind of person WE WANT to represent Scrubs?" Loran: "Thats the only kind of person WHO CAN represent Scrubs!" Gene: "Ill send the invitation." If you have a window, we have someone to lick it. Too bad I am incompetent and uneducated when it comes to video editing or creating assets for those comedic alterations ........ because I got quite a few "ideas". Anyway, for great Justice: Nose Booping! (we havnt had that one in a while)

Its WG. Sadly I am not a major in the Science of BS but I have a few suspicions of my own: If you ever got a chattban you get greatly more suceptible to another - potency increasing with each one (or the first 10, whatever). Also getting an initial karma-cushion probably helps too. This means if I harvest 50 reports its fine - because I am such a nice guy that never got chattbanned and only uses the salt for his ham an eggs, I am still fine. If someone else dares to criticise the awesome play of the 12 k avg. damage Grosse Turdwurst with 35 % WR or simply damages his invincible BB in any way, he gets chatbanned. This is totally fine ...... I guess. (well at least for me it is as I am not the one getting chatbanned) Well more for you to not believe: I can get 3k+ xp games be helpful/dont say anything -> reports. I can tell the idiots, cowards, parasites, exactly what I think of them. Hell I even condolence the enemy team and flame + reports complete fúcktards on the enemy team too if I witness their actions (teamkiller, douchbaggery etc) as it ruins the game no matter which side they are on. -> some compliments/outweighing the reports. This is my avatar on TS after all: If you are still not convinced I refer you to my clan mates or any division mates of mine really ......

That guy lost all credibility (what little of that was left anyway, because its not the first time he war verifiable BSing people) in my eyes when he brought/added numbers about "BB population on T1" (sic! -> spoiler: there simply arent any")/low tiers into the total to prove everything is actually fine and we are just seeing things - in a discussion about BB overpopulation at T8/high tiers. That is not only stupid and deceitful, its also insulting how he seemingly thinks people are not seeing right through his constant BSing at first glance. In RL you would tell such a "person" to stick it and piss off ... here, sadly, you are running constantly into his BS if you are remotely interested in the game. Well at least I dont have to feign more enthusiasm or esteem when reading any statement of his, than for some lice on my rosebushes.

Thanks man! Naturally I potatoed a few things too: Popped defensive to early. Saw the fighters going straight for my floatplane and was "certain" ( ) both north CV would dump on me. Well, my AA range nearly was extending to their flight decks and I (that was actually calculated and worked) was trying to attract the 3rd east CV too - better on Clev than the highly vulnerable north-eastern transport (yeah, that one) - and wanted the first torp planes dealt with before those arrived. That salvo on the Katori was because I knew I could fire a salvo before dealing with the DD - but I had AP loaded still! So I cleared the barrels with the next best target I could find in the short time, thus I followed main directive of this game: When in doubt, shoot the shitty cruiser/shittiest cruiser you can find - before raining HE on the DD which had by then the only real chance of getting anywhere near the transports/their torpedo range. €: Also I was not "only" () citfarming: Kuma lots of torps, fast reload great angles -> needs to die. Furu, less torps but usually widespread, great range, great angles -> needs to die. DDs .... depends. Longer reload and usually tight spread means need to die when near convoy but over not that big of a deal. Myoko is mainly a Gun-threat (a big one) and if you pay attention, you notice when you enter the dangerous assangles of them. That one really bad salvo the west cruiser wasnt my fault ....... lagspike or whatever. Its noticable on some other shots too I think. One thing I am actually proud of is how rushing the east fleet worked: Did only slight course adjustments to dodge some shells but mainly to keep keep over 30 knts in speed to get to the enemy as fast as possible as NOBODY was in the way to cover the transports (like I told them - but that is hardly news ). I knew once engaged the enemy bots wouldnt be able to resist a already damaged cruiser and would all be focusing me; but in order to get rid of them fast I needed that deadly close range for the AP dpm. Ofc digging into that heritage of not giving a damn while going for that melee worked: Also ofc pounding those Wardrums Scrub-style! Knew then torps where comming from the Kuma, likely widespread and executed a expensive imported High Sea Fleets "battle turn about to starboard" (orig.: Gefechtskehrtwendung), nowadays referred to as "Nope, nope and nope! Get me a few 100 meters more distance so they will run out) before turning back to attack position. Switched then to potato again ....... instead of using the plane right after cooldown, I waited until I had the suspicion of another wide range spread heading my way ........ and sure enough was right about that. Plane went up just in time, still I could have been much saver if launching right after cooldown. Oh well ......... (I love that one way to much, I would be interesting to know if the artist is around here too) Believe it or not, I only noticed what was going on damage wise when going over 400 k (and looking like 5 stars thanks to some damn miracle). Previously I had been occupied by desperation and fuelled by salt while trying to salvage this game. Lets be honest any victory (maybe 4 stars pretty please .....) with that sort a team is the best you can hope anyway ........ Still, this was bot-clubbing but that ....... damn! Even more impressive than the damage results is this; and it again proves my theories that you need _at least_ 2 players (and rather 4 most of the time for that matter). Well, and you had only 2 players anyway ........ I even put out the calculator: The rest of the team combined, 10 guys, have ~6,6 k base xp. You and that Fushon got 4,8 k combined!

I needed to enlist help for a reality check, here is the result: Are you for real? ....... weekend truly HAS started! Treading the forum already gives me shivers and drives me away from even opening the client since its also 200 % WE! btw: 12 % hr in Fuso ............. I seriously wonder why. Must be too small maps alright. I guess when you approach "historical BB" hit-ratios, the maps will be finally big enough ..........

What gives you this idea? The damage system is broken for so long now and apart from the occasional BSing we havent seen any progress there yet. They should be aware of it for 4 years now. They have been told - with proof - for 3 years by now. They are "aware and working on it" for 2 years now. They are "aware and working on it high priority" for 1 year now. Is there some secret to numerology that in the year #5 things will actually get fixed? Btw, another example of the broken [edited]damage system to follow: Ingame the bot angled in sharply and increased speed thus my salvo went rather long instead of midships and against his slim silhouette at a sharp angle instead of his boiler room -> One shell hits the stern and it bounces off ....... no damage ......... well except: The actual Edited So now even bouncing AP shells can do (module)damage - thats new! I know it was my only salvo against that cruiser at the bot got "fun and engaged" by BB AP afterwards. So knowing WG, I bet at least half of the shitty BB AP citadels on angled cruiser is AP bouncing of their citadels ...... and ofc still scoring a citadel ......... I wouldnt be surprised.

Just as a heads up : Wrong. Neither do you need "a full team" to select any operation nor to get 5 stars in all of them. You need 4 people for both because thats the lower limit set by WG, and which is also half of a full team of 8.

€2: This should have been an edit ....... damn. €: And now I totally forgot: Wolf right now be like:

Definitely - good to have you back. I can keep the Pony-flood side of things covered, but I lack in ship waifus. AO ofc has the normal Tai Hen covered. - and Marvin is back too? Good times! ^^ Looking forward to read/hear his bitching again. ^^ My Little Foody?! (10/10 would wtf again) btw: Amazing we still have no damn snow ......... Yes, even lower temperatures are in the forecast - but no precipitation then, and all snow deposited so far has instantly melted within a day. If the temperature forecast hold true I might have to take out my winter jacket ........ or at least close the zipper on my rain/wind jacket instead of just 1-2 buttons ........

For that thing alone the post gets the thumb up. ^^ I remember these from a long time ago - and now I got a pretty clear idea where they came from - but this one chart, I had to actually dig around a little: which is a response to this: you get the idea ....... but then I remembered: Obligatory- (and it actually took some creative tag searching ...because it had to exist! - the very law of nature on meming and trolling dictate this! ) Anyway for normally lewd waifu-needs: and the not so lewd one, which is also one of the emergency kits in case of Hypoglycemia ........... I have to say page 83 is probably very successful in "separating the wheat from the chaff".

Well you didnt run away screaming and screeching - that is either a very good or very very very bad sign. Hit up one of our overlords and they will assign a personal window/invite you to our com. chan and do the formalities/actual work. Yeah well, but it doesnt show TTT as a "client" clan (that what the Romans called their "peaceful acquisitions", right?) Double-W-Brothers - one of my favourites. Also I bet Sauron doesnt want it back now ......... or he is truly some sick fúck. Its ancient but its been on their YT chan for YEARS: Its stupid, its predictable yet still funny as all hell. Anyway, brought honour to clan by mercelessly clubbing the bots: More importantly: @mtm78 - Marvin is back? Good to see you back mate but what convinced you to give this mess of a game, which some noobs at Lesta are using as a dump constantly, another chance? Which of you grandpa-Scrublords are actually old enough to get that one? P.S.:

Anyway, I promise something special for today again ......... (see below at the very end if you are impatient) Looks interesting. I didnt plan to go for the French BBs - Richelieu after some time maybe - but for Ops ...... tempting - very tempting. What killstealing? If you ask Lulu, there has never been any killstealing in Scrub divisions ........ (see way below ) pve IS serious business - for once you get enemies that actually fight back instead and play properly - but then you still get the usual random plebs so its still hardmode unless you go for a Scrub division - in which case its ultra super hard mode to get any damage and kills. Wait is that Marvin on that screen? I thought or rather was worried that Marvin left for good. Good to see a fellow Scrub back in the windowlicking. Really glad to hear this especially. I would have ragequitted long ago if not for divsions/Scrubs. So you know how playing solo in ops is ...... you try your best to win, you team tries their best to loose, IE this is only a 3 star victory: So of Newport this was my best game xp wise (not damage wise, got a few 200+ but less xp) - could have been more but I got izumod ....... 2250 base is solid - but only a foreshadow of things to come ....... I got a free day of p2w times and went to club the bots a little ...... I thought this result was pretty sick ...... also the 12 kills ....... Then again, getting over 200 k is not that "uncommon" when playing solo .... Ofc I had some tard games too: Sick damage, sick amount of cits ...... but the XP/creds is suspiciously low? Well ofc, its only 4 stars! Thank god they are all alive except me, because that gives stars/rewards ........ actually ..... no it doesnt! Anyway I remember @lup3s had a sick amount of cits in his Anshan (?) but is 43 really enough to challenge this? Lets see ....... I got some solid carries no matter the cruiser I pick - but not quite the jaw dropper so far ...... So I got this game which definitely was a step up: Yet even more citadels, 13 kills (sick!) and finally that 300+ k game: but then I joined up with @000_LULU_000 for a few games. You know how it is, with a fellow excellent division mate naturally your kill count and damage goes down ....... except if you get "motivated" "Only" 250+ k - but 14 kills - I call that ....... "solid". (18 division kills - the rest of the team got ...... 5 ) We decided to go for perfect equality next game: 7 kills for Lulu, 7 for me, 7 for the rest of the team. So I had 15 mins of p2w time left and thought I could one more game WITH the bonus (turns out: No I cant, see below): Ok I know this post if [edited]ridiculous in length now, but I crammed in stuff from over a week and still left out most; so one more thing: @lup3s I summon thee! Are those enough citadels for a new record? I not that rare for me to get double the xp of the next guy ...... but 3 times? Also more than 50 % of the damage caused ....... Jesus! Its the first time I got crucial contribution, pseudo-high calibre or whatever it is called outside Dunkirk (and even there it was a huge carry! but at least possible). @MrConway, @Tuccy, @Kandly, @Ph3lan- do you have any idea how hard that is to get? I mean really? I resent but accept I cant do missions like Aigle-Marathon or now the one with the ludicrous 25 torpedo hits but then you do manage CC and get ........ nothing? Ofc despite the game starting well within p2w time, when it came to the payouts it switched back to normal peasant levels ..... I admit ..... dissapointing. Anyway, I am half tempted to send the replay to Jingles ...... if I only knew how - because then I would ask to visit and read ~10 random pages of the Scrub recruitment topic.

I hope we didnt .......... disappoint. So whats the verdict after the "invigorating lecture"? TTT has a new ruler, and its Princess Derpy of Srubbingtonborougshire (say that 20 times fast in a native speakers/Genes/Tims/etc accent ). Tribute from TTT has to be paid in units of gr0pah. Tbf there only one thing better that one Derpy .... and thats two times the Derpy. Man I clubbed to bots hard in ops today - I even had fun playing solo. I think I had at least 200 k avg damage over those games. Its amazing what you can do if you utterly disregard personal savety and just go ham. Bonus point with a light cruiser waiting on the reload is short - essentially: Probably helped that there was no game below 4 stars ..... and I think only 4 (?) of those in total. Ofc the one game I meed Joby I potato hard ....... still came 2nd.

lup3s like always has the right idea^^. Nothing special today - I am just procrastinating getting a shave + shower ......so have lazy Dashie and Windy Also ........

I never expected a full blown official collaboration ofc. Many games have references, cameos or even small appearances. Just an example: Everyone without a clue gets these what these color patterns are supposed to be, everyone without doesnt but is also not bothered ...... and you cant copyright "pink and yellow" for example. Another example by Google: Simple yet effective. Or the other way around, for example MLP: FIM had the Lutece twins from Bioshock: Infinite ponified in the background with a bird cage - a great subtle reference at a time when that game was in its prime. The even had freaking Kratos as "ancient beasts dealer" cameo in a episode too! - this guy: You know - for kids! otherwise fanart like this wouldnt exist: and last but not least Episode 100 was a full blown shout out to the fans anyway and I would be heavily surprised if the "target audience" or everyone in a few years wont be like: wtf is THAT ?! So again, considering how popular weeb-stuff and even Pony is in Russia, I am surprised there isnt more Pony in the game.....

Not a girl, not gr0pah ..... hmmmm ... In that case Gold, Incense and Myrrh seem a little old fashioned. Still, Waifus, Ponies and Memes are maybe worth a try.... (Anyway, hit up the overlords and dont forget to read THE ENTIRE THREAD! beforehand ) Long week and then you realise its going to be Friday/last day: fed the birds (some treats) today and it actually looked like a beaked version of this:

I actually wouldnt mind Flutters "chainsaw face" as a flag when going ham. ^^ or my current avatar .......... or a gazillion other pics for that matter. Common effect of intro/theme. Usually the ones either getting hooked by other scenes or making past that get full end infected. I know I definitely remember my fist contact and infection wasnt with episode 1. I am actually surprised there is not more Pony in this game because apparently they are/(were?) even more crazy about them in Russia.

I'd say that alone would be enough for any application. (god old times btw) Inviting people into our com-chan is the first thing we do anyway - so the experience the magic of divisioning. I leave all the recruiting stuff to our Overlords - its part of our work sharing agreement: They do the actual work, AO has the Thai Hen covered and I provide the Pony-flood. Speaking of which: But in any way: Welcome! Man I remember when Loran recruited me, it was something along those lines:

......... all that, and I even didnt post yet? Nailed it? (and surpassed your ..... "expectations" even too, maybe? ) Personally, I think the thread and the rage should have the same level of freshness. You cant pour red hot rage into an sour old thread and expect everyone to experience the taste of the bile as if the thread was freshly cut and harvested too! FOR fresh locally produced free range salt completely bio and AGAINST packed long range shipped goods.

As usual: Pony to the rescue (from page 2): I dont have to work tomorrow - so that visualizes my mood pretty much: Also pretty good advice in case you are actually having a bad day. I even got something for our clanwarriors - but its key to select stronkerest russian ships only or else it wont work: ........ and well in case that fails there is always the possibility of calling in the cavalry or at least deadly mounted troops. (promise no actual Pony to be found in the picture below)

There is a reason I only got like 97 % WR in co-op ........ Draws dont exist just like BB overpopulation! I call hags! I went for a few randoms to do the missions. Still failed the citadel mission because I unfortunately had to work. Yeah, I think I can stop trying for the Aigle now - saves the frustration later on as I do know WG and their "mission design" - and go back to ops. Anyway, had a nice time with some fellow clanmates! T10 "I am not dead - hurray!" edition. Next up: Meeting somebody from [PONY] = and my favourite game of the evening: So we had this floating turd on our side which refused to spot, cap or even trying to contest a cap. Instead of using 2 smoke cruisers and a Battleship providing close range support, he ran off to where he could achieve nothing while exposing himself to a combined crossfire from at least half their fleet. But yeah, that truly and undeniably beats "potentially" facing two DDs of which one is a Kamikaze R in the cap ....... So again: Why cant it cap or at least use the close range support to spot an be somewhat useful? Indeed, for Jellyfishes are spineless creatures too .......... In other news: I am above 70 karma again; yay! More reports for turds randomly drifting around; or well, in the off-chance I ever run out of compliments some more of the them too, I guess. In the end we did exactly what that water pollution suggested: We capped by ourselves. So this division carry + the well seasoned cellar potato down there ........ thats a good game in my book.

(Fallout series/Fallout 4 in case somebody didnt recognise the scene right at the start at the mirror)