Procrastes

That would be anywhere except on the Ocean map.

Max von Sydow would have made a great Commander in WoWs. The only one I can think of right away that would have been his equal, is Christopher Lee.

The economy of those hillbilly rural quaint border towns has been in a state of collapse since the 17th century. It's not a bug, it's a feature.

Right back at you, mate - and we can accept quite a lot, when it comes from our former colonies!* * EDITED: Actually, it was more of an unequal union that was unilaterally dissolved by Norway in 1905. The dissolution was grudgingly accepted by the Swedish government at the time. This was before Norway found oil in the North Sea in the 1960s, mind you. Right now the Norwegians are sitting on their fjells with more money than God, poking fun at their poor muppet neighbours (see post #13 below).

We have Birgit Nilsson, Jenny Lind, Jussi Björling... heck, we have ABBA. But ask anyone for a Swedish voice-over, and they will pick that blasted kitchen muppet every time...!

I have now voted on this poll, in a perhaps somewhat incongruent way. For me personally, 2 million free xp is too steep a price to pay outright for any ship. I'd be willing to pay 1,5 million for the Småland, and that's that. However: Given the standard price rise between tiers, and the inflation of xp gain over time due to the increased availability of special flags such as Dragon flags etc., I'd still say that the set price of 2 million free xp for a tier X ship is justifiable, and even reasonable. It's just more than I am currently willing to pay. A nice and informative poll, @MrFingers!

An overbold move on my part, obviously. What can I say - I have trained myself to contend caps when I sail out in a destroyer. I I see one up for grabs, I go for it. Learning how to play successfully in the Kléber will take time; it is quite another thing than such comfortable ships as, say, the Daring, which has the tools to fit any situation and can choose between fight or flight as it will. You did well during all parts of the battle that I could see, for that matter.

I'd never stat bash anyone, or look at their numbers uninvited. I rarely check my own, for that matter. So I normally stay well away from all discussions concerning personal gaming statistics. But this time, and just out of honest curiosity, I'll bite. So what I am seeing here... ...means, if I read it right, that you have played at least 150 Co-op battles, all of which were wins, giving you a 100% win rate in Co-op battles. I can also see that you have played at least 1 Random battle, which was a win, giving you a 100% win rate in Random battles as well. I can't tell from your screen shot whether these figures refer to certain ships only, or to all your battles of respective type (irrespective of ship). I have read and re-read your posts a couple of times, and tried to figure out if there is some conundrum there - which is what I suspect, given what you write about every bit of information being true and this still not telling "the whole picture". But if there is a hidden meaning, I can't see it. I blame it on the summer heat and encroaching old age. A question which may or may not be pertinent in the context, is this: How many Random Battles have you played in total? Trying to interrogate a fellow forumite, however, would be impertinent as all hell, not to mention rude. So I will encourage you to pass or to reply as you wish, with nothing further said about it. Either way, please let me congratulate you to at least one (1) Random Battle well played! Seven warships destroyed and over two thousand base (?) xp in the bag, is quite a tally!

I am currently vacillating between the Thunderer and Kuznetsov, myself. Not that I'm there yet, but I think I will have enough coal stocked up by the end of summer to be able to get either of them, but not both. The argument for Kuznetsov... ...is that he is good enough to provide a very real tactical advantage even to a barely competent player such as myself. There are other special commanders with comparable bonuses, but activating their special powers typically requires you to get a "Kraken unleashed!" award and sacrifice three black chickens to Tsathoggua (or something of a similar magnitude). Kuznetsov's most distinguishing special power on the other hand - the one that puts out all fires, plugs all leaks, activates a heal consumable (even if you don't have one) and adds 20 percent to the dispersion values of incoming fire - merely requires you to take enough of a beating so that you drop to below 10 percent of your hit points. Even I can do that on a regular basis. And on top of that, you can specify his skills in such a way that he will do well on basically any Russian battleship or cruiser. If you look up the expression 'Russian bias' in the National Encyclopaedia, you'll see this face... ...looking back at you. He is that good. He is that annoying. The arguments for the Thunderer... ...are that she is a drop-down gorgeous, strong (but well balanced) tier X battleship with a fairly unique play style, she is well received and highly thought of in most relevant naval circles, and you can put the more than unique special commander Mighty Jingles on her bridge. If you look up the expression 'rockstar, brain surgeon, horse thief and noob gamer extraordinaire' in the National Encyclopaedia, you'll see this face... ...looking back at you. Commander Jingles might not have any special powers, but he's cool with that. Meanwhile, his own inimitable take on the in-game voice-over regularly has me almost falling off my gaming chair for giggles, and that's something I can't say for any other naval commander in history. So for me personally, there's not too much to think about. Unless I get clear indication that Kuznetsov is being pulled from the store, I will go for the Thunderer as my first pick of the two. I should add that if you don't currently have Commander Mighty Jingles on your roster, I don't know when, or if, you can get hold of him. But the Thunderer is an excellent ship even without him on the bridge, and there are other special British commanders that will serve her well. Best of luck whatever you choose, Captain @Mookle!

I recently fired four salvoes at a submarine 300 yardas away that was driving at less than 5 meters below the surface - the conning tower stuck up over the waves - and failed to hit it. Not even any splash damage from the HE shells. True, I was in my T-61 and I expect that her guns don't pack much of a splash damage area, but the other week I shot two full salvoes from my Warspite at a submarine at the same depth and distance, with no effect whatsoever. On the other hand, this morning an allied Bayern managed to sink the last enemy submarine with its guns, so it is doable. It just seems a bit too random. I mean, sure, I sorta suck at gunnery, but not that much... On the other hand, if you manage to get on top of a submarine, you can kill it quite easily with your depth charges. I never need more than two passes with my T-61, and I usually manage it in one go in my Icarus (those British depth charges pack a mean punch).

But over time, we learned and grew wiser. For instance, we know now that if we slowly slide sideways onto a gently sloped sandbank, we can get stuck for up to a full minute (often with fatal consequences), but if we instead drive straight into a rock at full speed, we can just back off and drive away.

Given how small all our in-game maps are, the steep drops are necessary in order make it possible to navigate around at all. Having shallows instead, would quickly transform most or even all ships into off-shore gun platforms anchored in the seabed. The scale of the maps is quite hilarious, by the way. Next time you sail by one of those little towns or castles that adorn the islands, take a good look at it, and then compare it to your ship in size!

Hello, Captain @Verblonde! So nice to see you in action, as it were! You out-gunned that other Halland and finished, what, second or third on points? I'd call that a good match! Me, I started out well enough by taking a cap and putting a couple of torps in nearby enemies, giving a German cruiser a bloody nose and helping to put an Öland out of its misery. I would have gotten away with it, too, if a wild Ibuki hadn't suddenly appeared around the island and boxed me in - and that, as they say, was that. I still did much better than in my previous battle, where I met Captain @Deckeru_Maiku on my very first outing in the Kléber, and I potatoed completely, ending last on my team. I have watched a few of Flamu's videos on the Kléber, and thought I'd try out his ambush playstyle - but it was I who got ambushed instead. It's going to take a while before I get anywhere with the Kléber - but the way I'm thinking is, if I don't try anything new, I won't learn anything new either. Hope to meet both of you again on the high seas - stay safe out there!

The Graf Spree is actually one of very few cruisers in the game with any kind of workable armour...!

I think submarines should be unable to spot for the team while submerged. That would fix the problem with being perma-spotted by an enemy which you have to be right on top of to be able to kill. And not that it matters, but it would also fit in well with historical accuracy, since WW2-era submarines were not able - as far as I know - to transmit radio signals from under the water. The sub would know that the enemy ship was there, but it would be unable to tell its team mates.

I promoted both Cunningham and the, a-hem, Ovenchicken, to full flag rank - 19 points - immediately after recruiting them. It cost me a heffa-load of elite and free xp, but it was the only way to go about it that ensured I wouldn't hurt inside every time I take them out to battle. I won't say it wasn't worth it, since both of them are now bringing in a good load of elite xp to train their younger colleagues. So I guess it all goes around. Once I get the Thunderer, I'll promote Commander Mighty Jingles to First Sea Lord, and put him on the bridge. He'll like that.

Ah. Of course. My condolences. I... I spoke without thinking. I am so sorry. The pain must be very great.

...okay, I'll bite. Wut? I'm no CV expert, but I do seem to recall having the Hermes and the Ark Royal in my port. And whatever else they may be, they are Royal Navy...?

While this is certainly true, there are those who would say that instant obliteration by AP citadels is too quick and easy a death for a Smolensk. As for me, I'm always happy to find a battleship captain with enough savvy to know how to switch between ammo types. Even when I'm on the receiving end.

While on the subject of cultural trivia: Is the Laughing Cow perhaps somehow connected to the origin of the popular comical expression, "MOO-HAHA!!!"...? I'll get my coat.

And some people say that Germans have no sense of humour. I, of course, know better - but this is still priceless information! Incidentally, there was an agreeable little restaurant called 'The Hot Cow' in a city where I lived many years ago. Alas, it is no more (the restaurant, that is)... so I am grateful for tips about where to find some other bovine burger business!

I believe I read something a few years ago about it being possible - though very unlikely - to citadel a Tirpitz/Bismarck through the nose, if a shot goes in right underneath one of the gun turrets at a certain angle. I'm unsure about the details. And it is possible, although unlikely, to citadel even German battleships at close range. The turtleback is not an absolute protection against this. Anyway, about the Smolensk: When you face one of those in a battleship next time, don't waste your time fretting about bouncing your AP. Just load high explosive and SWAT HER LIKE A FLY.

Bounces on the Smolensk? With BB caliber shells? I guess it could happen, but are you sure it wasn't just overpens?

I am currently stocking up on coal for the Thunderer. The only alternative purchase right now, is that OP Russian commander, Kuznetsov... and I worry that if I get either of them, the other will be pulled from the shop with six months' notice or something like that. It doesn't really help me to get that sort of notice, since I can't count on being able to stock up enough coal over that time period anyway - having a life outside WoWs and all that. I will most likely be getting the Thunderer. From all I've heard, she's an amazing ship, and pouncing first on that ludicrously overpowered Russian commander might make me feel just a bit of a cad. Not that feeling like a bit of a cad stopped me from getting the Smolensk while she was available. But, as I love to spread around: The Smolensk can be handled quite easily by just loading HE. Kuznetsov, in the Kremlin? Not so much...

I have also found those bots to be lamentably lacking in brotherhood spirit, yes. But I confess that pressing 'G' , and then watching the DC counter rack up a double-digit hit tally as that submarine blighter is stomped into the seabed, gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling.... don't take it personally! The Ernst Gaede is a good choice, by the way - but her premium sister, the T-61, is straight up better.